I love making jewelry. I'm literally in love with my profession. Throughout the years I've been doing this (10 years already), many people have been asking me if this really is what I want to do. To be honest, they can cause a small fear to creep into my heart, but just for a little while. Until I discover something new, or make something I've never made before. And the thing is, there's always something new to learn. That seems a bit frustrating when you start and you think - I will need years to know everything! Then comes the stage where you realize- I will never be able to learn EVERYTHING there is to know about jewelry. It's just impossible. And now I'm at this stage where I just get more excited when I think - There is so much still left to learn.
And then there are these thoughts about meaning - What is the meaning of all this? Wouldn't you prefer making a change - being a lawyer or a doctor? Well, I thought about this a lot, and I came to two conclusions-
1 - I would always strive to create some kind of awareness for those in need (mainly shelter animals), through the power the jewelry can give me (and that can be quite a lot).
2- I see the faces of people receiving their dream jewel, or a gift from a loved one, and I know they will carry them for years to come, and always get that sensation of happiness when they look at them. Now isn't that something worthwhile? That moment of simple joy is something we strive for in anything we do. And this little piece of treasure can be with you wherever you go... That means something to me.
So because I'm 27, and I've got "my whole life ahead of me", people tend to project their regrets onto me – like that path they didn’t take, that they THINK they would have been happier if they did… I don’t have the answers, will I regret not studying law when I had the chance? Maybe, maybe not. In high school I quit programming class which came pretty easily to me, so that I could do the theater major. Would it help me get a god pay job if I had a computer major? Yes… But would I love what I was doing? Actually, those two years in theater were the only years I enjoyed my stay at the educational system through all 12 years of school. So I think yes, it was worth it, and I learned so much about myself just from being true to me, and living a story that is exciting to live.
In this aspect, my "illness" (Fibromyalgia) has given be a new perspective - I understood there is no point worrying about tomorrow's tomorrow – What will my life be like in 5 years? Will I be able to provide for the children I'm supposed to have by then? These are really stressful questions for everyone, and especially for someone with a socially unrecognized disability. And my conclusion was, that if thinking about my future makes me want to stop living, I'm better off with living in my present.
And so, with everything I said here,
my conclusion is, I love making jewelry!